This week on Parenting, one father asked for advice on how to get his teenager daughter to be more considerate with the money she earns from her part-time job.

“I am the father of a 16-year-old girl who’s going through her entitlement phase and she can’t take no for an answer,” he told Moncrieff.

“She’s a polite young lady, but throws a fit if she doesn’t get her way.

“Her friends are obsessed with online shopping and splurging on clothes from fast-fashion websites like Shein.

“Inevitably, my daughter also wants to join in and have cool new clothes every week.

“She works a part-time job and she’s spending all her money on these purchases, which I think is a waste – not to mention she barely ever wears all the clothes she buys.

“When I tell her about my concerns, she snaps back, saying that I just don’t get it and that she isn’t using my money so it shouldn’t bother me anyway.

“This usually leads to fights that can go on for days.

“How do I get her to make her own decisions and teach her about financial responsibility all while not damaging the relationship I have with my daughter?”

Father telling off daughter. Image: Chris Rout / Alamy.

Family psychotherapist Joanna Fortune said that there needs to first be a conversation about which of her own expenses this girl should be responsible for.

“When our kids start getting part-time jobs, I think as parents we’re all down for the day and really glad when it happens,” she said.

“It’s still important that we’ve set ground rules about what we expect them to do with that money.

“So, I’m not saying they’re going to be paying your mortgage for you or anything like that, but you might be saying they’re going to cover their phone costs or they’re going to cover some personal items.”

'Ground rules'

Joanna said that since these ground rules were never set in place, this man’s daughter is “quite right in her assumption [that], ‘It’s my money to do with as I choose’.”

“ I want to say it’s never too late and you can go back and do that – but also it might be too late if she’s now got a set of expectations that it’s her money and she can do with it as she pleases,” she said.

According to Joanna, it would be a good idea to initiate a conversation with the girl about the general impacts of fast fashion, rather than directly criticising her individual choices.

She also recommended encouraging the girls to only buy one item a week, or to swap clothes with each other before they go and spend their money on something new.

Main image: Teenage girls using tablet for online shopping. Image: Connect Images / Alamy.