What can family members do to help a child cope in the aftermath of their parent’s suicide?
This week, Newstalk has been examining the issue of parental suicide in collaboration with the Rosalynn Carter Fellowship for Mental Health Journalism in Ireland.
As part of the series, child psychologist Joanna Fortune set out how to help a child cope with the impact of such a devastating event.
On The Pat Kenny Show, Ms Fortune described the parent-child relationship as usually “the most significant relationship children have”.
“You often hear phrases like a parent is a child’s secure base, a safe haven to return to in times of distress,” she said.
“So, actually, the death itself of the parent is a traumatic loss for children.
“But also, the loss of that secure connection is a traumatic experience in and of itself.”
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Ms Fortune said all children will need “significant” support in the aftermath of parental suicide and that the impact on them is usually different to that of a bereavement caused by a physical illness.
“With traumatic grief, your typical sadnesses can be overwhelmed with other very big feelings - like anger, confusion, guilt, rejection, abandonment, any feelings like that,” she said.
“So, when you bring the parent to mind, the sadness can be overclouded with these more overwhelming feelings that can then force the child to struggle to grieve and to process because the anger is what’s consuming them.
“Children don’t often have the emotional ability to say, ‘I’m overwhelmed by these dominant feelings’ but they tell us with their behaviour.
“It could be changes to eating, sleeping, toilet use, school refusal, refusal to participate in activities that are a typical part of their day.
“I am talking about beyond say, two, three months; it is quite typical for a grief period for some of that to be present.
“But we would expect after two-months - again that’s just a guideline - that children are beginning to lean into the security of routine.”
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Ms Fortune continued that suicide “affects everybody in the family” and surviving parents need to take care of their own mental wellbeing, as well as their child’s.
“The best thing any of us will do - and it sounds a bit twee but I really do mean this - is to take care of yourself,” she said.
“Because it is an investment in your child; how can you give what you haven’t got?
“Really make sure that you resource yourself, that you seek support, that you lean into your own support network around you.”
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Ms Fortune added that families should try and get children “re-established into a typical routine” when possible.
“I think it’s really important to notify their school, even if it’s just giving the teacher a nod that this is a handle with care day,” she said.
“But school can be a really valuable resource for families at times like this because children spend so much of their day there.”
Newstalk's Losing A Parent To Suicide series is supported by the Rosalynn Carter Fellowship for Mental Health Journalism in Ireland, in partnership with Shine. It was produced by senior producer and 2025 fellow Claire Darmody.
If you or someone you know has been impacted by suicide, you can contact the Samaritans on 116 123, email them at jo@samaritans.ie or visit www.samaritans.ie to find your nearest branch.
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