Should Irish women prioritise themselves over their children?

It’s a sensitive topic that many mothers - or fathers - would never even think of asking themselves. 

Yet, it is a question that weight loss expert Dr Eva Orsmond regularly poses to women who come to her for medical advice. 

“I hear this in my clinics all the time when I ask women who want to [change] their diet, lose weight and get well again,” she explained to Lunchtime Live. 

“I ask them, ‘Who is the most important person in your life?’ 

“Most of the time, it’s like, ‘My children’ or ‘My husband.’

“And they’re actually proud saying that and I’m like, ‘Sorry, that’s the wrong answer.’ 

“They look at me a little bit weird and I say, ‘No, it’s actually yourself - you are the most important person in your life and everything else comes after that.’” 

A woman reads a book to children. Picture by: Alamy.com. 

Dr Orsmond, a mother of two herself, added this seems to be a “quite a new concept for Irish women”. 

“Women tend to find time to cook multiple meals in the house for different likes and dislikes,” she said. 

“We know that overweightness and obesity is a huge problem - this is what I often work on in my clinics. 

“Women come, they say, ‘I’m absolutely exhausted.’” 

Other countries

Originally from Finland, Dr Orsmond said she moved to Ireland 25 years ago but beforehand lived for several years in Italy. 

There she found women had a slightly different attitude to childrearing and recounted the anecdote of one friend. 

“‘Eva, what is the best thing you can give to your children? The best thing is that you’re happily parents, that’s the first thing’,” she recalled. 

Dr Orsmond added that her own upbringing was different to that of most Irish people. 

“I’m an only child and my mother was working and I can’t definitely say that she was putting me first in her life,” she said. 

“That actually made me more independent, I had to do things more; I wasn’t nurtured until later in life.”

Main image: Mother and child have a talk. Picture by: Angela Hampton Picture Library / Alamy Stock Photo