What age is suitable for a mobile phone? My daughter is 9 and she feels left out as all her friends in school have one but I’m not sure if she is old enough to have one yet?

The age at which a child should be given a mobile phone is a modern problem facing all parents. There are no hard and fast rules about this and parents are left to their own devices in making a decision. Surrounded by parents with different views, some of whom have given young children phones and some who haven't, there is nowhere for parents to turn for a definitive answer. Unfortunately I am unable to provide one as well.

A lot depends on the development of the child. It isn't about age, it is more about how responsible and reliable your child is becoming. All children around age 8 or 9 will want a mobile phone. Many of them know their same-age friends have phones. Sometimes there can be a social cost to not having a phone. For example a child might be teased about it. Often it is just the allure of mass marketing which makes a child want a phone. The decision must be based on practicality and knowledge of your child.

If you lead a busy life and are often on the road running messages and taking children to and fro various events a mobile phone may be a useful instrument that enables you and your child to make contact in times of need. If your child is quite responsible and is able to manage a phone reasonably it may be a good choice to give them one. A lot comes down to practical issues such as how busy is our family life, am I, the parent, likely to be late at times in collecting my child.

In general I don't think it is necessary for a child age 9 to have a mobile phone and if you, the parent, don't think so either don't be afraid to say no. Is there an age at which I think a child should have a phone? I think 12 is a good year to seriously consider it. 

David Carey, consulting psychologist, joins Sean every Wednesday at 3pm on the Parenting Slot