The phrase ‘ageing gracefully’ gets thrown around a lot, but what does it really mean in a world where looking your age can feel like a rebellious act?
Senior features writer with the Independent Helen Coffey told Newstalk Breakfast that while “it does sound quite extreme”, ageing can come with a sense of grief for many people.
“I think particularly as a woman, the older I get, the more I do kind of see that issue,” she said.
“It’s coming to terms with the fact that you have to let something go; you have to let your youth go, the way you used to look go, because it’s not going to continue.
“For some people, clearly that’s a real battle to let that go.”
Portrait of senior woman applying anti-aging cream. Image: GOODLUZ / Alamy. 1 May 2017Ms Coffey said that whether they are conscious of it or not, a lot of women are taught to value themselves based on their looks.
“I don’t think women are walking around thinking, ‘Gosh, I hope everyone fancies me’, but I think we’re so culturally and socially conditioned that our highest value and our worth is really wrapped up in our looks," she said.
“Lots of older women talk about suddenly being invisible post the menopause like, ‘I used to walk down the street and was aware of eyes on me' - and then they’re not.
“Whether or not you are comfortable with being looked at, I think reframing your identity is like, 'That is not the most important thing about me'.”
'Liberating'
However, Ms Coffey said that many women feel liberated by age for the same reason.
“I’ve often heard women in their sort or, 50s, 60s, saying once you get past that and get over that, it is one of the most beautiful, liberating times in your life,” she said.
According to Ms Coffey, many women also become insecure as they age when they compare themselves to their Hollywood counterparts, who often go to extreme lengths to retain their youthful looks.
Main image: Woman checking ageing skin at the mirror. Image: SIMON RAWLEY / Alamy.
