It's that time of year again, as the Late Late Toy Show ushers in another season of gifts, fake/real Christmas tree debates and ghost-induced conversions for miserly businessmen.
As you tut at the excitement caused by today's must-have toys, we take you on a trip down memory lane - to the not-too-distant 90s - to revisit the often ridiculous playthings you once bothered your parents about.
After all, you've no right to feel superior. You liked pogs.
The Talk Boy
In one of the most clean-cut instances of successful product placement - Macaulay Culkin and Home Alone 2 made a random tape recorder with a speaker attached to it an absolute must-have (they probably also implanted the idea that you'd quite like to live in New York at some point in the back of your head).
In fairness - it did get little Kevin McCallister out of all sorts of hairy situations...
Buzz Lightyear
Buzz Lightyear was the 'it' toy of Christmas 1995 - there was only one problem - he was never supposed to be.
Disney went all-in on Woody dolls being the must have, but his intergalactic buddy proved to be the break out hit.
This is actually the same issue which led to the Elsa famine and causing fights outside of toy shops last December - Anna was meant to be the star of the film and the most popular toy.
These calls are made far in advance, and once manufacturers realise they've got it wrong it can take months get more stock. This is because of intense competition to get manufacturing time in the factories in which they are produced - leading to these festive shortages.
Ultimately the fiasco is said to have cost Disney $50m.
Baby Born
An incredibly life-like baby doll that actually cried and went to the toilet - what's not to like? It seems less likely that today, as Toys'R'Us has bowed to pressure and abandoned its gender specific displays, that a plastic baby that trains pre-pubescent girls for motherhood would have the same success - but that's the 90s for you.
Pro Action
Subbuteo might be the quintessential table football game, but spare a thought for Pro Action - its sexed up magnetic 9'0s cousin.
It made its dent in the market in the middle of the decade - and was later revived as Total Action Football with an endorsement from the then it-kid of English football Michael Owen.
The game is still available as Total Action Football.
Red Power Ranger
Red Power Ranger was another one of those toys that department store Santas had to warn kids that he might not be able to get his hands on.
Once the show took off in the UK and Ireland, the company which managed the franchise's rights was worried about over-exposing the brand, leading to a Christmas shortage.
Dreamphone
Combine Guess Who and Saved By the Bell and what do you get? The Dream Phone.
Use your Zach Morris-style mobile phone to work out which guy likes you. Bonus for the ninetiestastic TV spot.
Turns out it was Dan.
Super Soakers
Don't bring a water balloon to a water gun fight. Instead of spending hours tying knots, Super Soakers allowed you to dispatch your friends/enemies with a high velocity stream of water after just a few pumps. These came in a variety of styles and sizes, depending on quite how seriously you took water fights.
And here's an ad with a revenge plot that would never grace the TV these days.
Pogs
Remember pogs? Remember shiny pogs? Remember slammers? These cardboard discs were all the rage for reasons now lost to the sands of time.
Did you know you can (read: should) buy 100,000 Michael Jordan pogs for just over $1,000? They have to come back eventually... surely...
Alf pogs were of course the most sought-after.
Furby
Released in 1998, this vaguely owl-like creature reached sales of 40 million in its first three years of production. Native Furbish speakers, they were programmed to learn English after a time, though they proved far from bright students.
They blinked a lot too.
In case you need to brush up on your Furbish phrases:
- u-nye-boh-doo?: How are you?
- u-nye-loo-lay-doo?: Do you want to play?
Crystal growing sets
Before Breaking Bad ruined the innocence of crystal making, kids tossed away instructions and played around with unpronounceable chemicals to create any sort of reaction at all.
Sometimes you got crystals, sometimes a putrid smelling sludge - but that's the beauty of experimentation. You never know what you're going to get.